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The Blotter: Flexible space oddity

Outside a West End shopping mall, a cop saw a black car stopped with a twitchy male driver inside "[The driver] had a very hostile demeanor toward me," the cop noted. "I asked [him] why he was so agitated. [He] advised that he felt that he was being harassed and that he didn't do anything wrong."

The driver, a 34-year-old man from Douglasville, admitted to consuming alcoholic beverages before getting into his car. The man said he was bipolar and has a thyroid condition. "[His] movements were very erratic," the cop noted.

The driver failed several field sobriety tests and blew more than three times the legal limit for blood-alcohol content. "It took me and multiple other officers to hold [the driver] on the hood of my patrol vehicle in order to finish searching him," the cop noted. "While in the rear of my patrol vehicle, [the driver] became increasingly irate. [He] screamed that we were extorting and kidnapping people. At one point, [the driver] screamed, 'I'm an alien!' and also screamed, 'Can you suck your own dick?'"

Gender bender

A brouhaha erupted on the dance floor of an East Atlanta club. A cop spotted a 25-year-old man in a torn white T-shirt standing in the parking lot. "I noticed that his shirt was ripped and he appeared to have been involved in a dispute," a cop noted. The man said he was at the dance club with a female friend and an agitated guy kept trying to dance with his friend. The man told police the agitated guy punched him three times and he defended himself. "He just kept fuckin' hitting me," the man told police. Eventually, the man was able to wrestle the agitated guy to the dance floor. "When I told him that he was reported fighting with a female, he stated there was no way this guy was a girl," a cop noted.

The man's female friend said they were at the dance club to see a drag show and a strange woman started dancing with her and was getting really pushy and physical. "[The female friend] even stated that the staff of the location attempted to pull the woman away from her, apologizing, stating that she is often aggressive with patrons at the location," the cop noted. "[Her male friend] stepped in and a fight ensued. I asked [her] to describe the other female and she stated she had very short hair, like mine, which was short and shaved on the sides and not much hair on top."

The cop tracked down the mystery female dancer. She said she was trying to dance with a cute girl at the club and a guy got offended and a fight started. She wants to press charges.

Strange calling, part 1

A man recently called a store at a Westside strip mall and "said he was part of the Illuminati and by the end of the day, the store would be blown up," a cop noted. Everyone was evacuated from the building and Homeland Security swept in. Turns out, the Illuminati man was blowing smoke. Nothing erupted at the store, and nothing was missing or out of place.

Strange calling, part 2

In the Edgewood district, a man said someone illegally booted his silver Saturn. How did he know? "He states he attempted to call the number listed on the sticker, and it was a porn hotline," a cop noted. The man called the 800 number while the cop was present. Indeed, it was a porn hotline.

The ex files

A 32-year-old woman returned to her home near Greenbriar Mall and found her bedroom in total disarray. "[The woman] stated that a lady she was messing with trashed her room and stole items," a cop noted. "[The woman] stated that [at about 6 p.m.], the lady contacted her to meet up and throw away a sex toy that they would use together. When [the 32-year-old] refused, it caused the lady to get angry due to the fact that [the 32-year-old] broke up with her earlier this week."

The woman said her ex-lover made threats and tried to contact her on Facetime, which she didn't answer. The woman said the front door to her home is usually unlocked because her mother is always there, and her ex-lover knows this and took advantage of the situation. The woman's bedroom mirror was shattered. The only items missing included a pair of green Gucci flip-flops and a white Armani outfit.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.



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