Culture Surfing - Fiona Zedde gets bi

What the Atlanta-based erotica writer finds hot

Fiona Zedde might be an Atlantan, but the princess of lesbian/bisexual erotica sure seems to know her way around the bright lights and dark shadows of Miami nightlife in her latest steamer, Hungry for It. Rémi, a South Beach nightclub owner, finds herself in over her head as she juggles a competitor with her burgeoning desire for her best friend’s mother. Zedde appears at her old stomping grounds, Charis Books & More, on Saturday, July 5, at 8 p.m. for a book signing and reading. Here’s what else Fiona finds hot.

Tila Tequila: “When her show first came on air, I was in shock. Bi girls and lesbians on a reality show on mainstream TV? Well, VH1, but it was still a shock. I really got into the faux cliffhanger toward the end of ‘Will Tila choose the hot butch fire-chyk Dani or the weak straight boy, What’s-His-Name?’ When the show was a surprise hit I cheered. When Tila came back for a second shot at love — which wasn’t that much of a surprise — I stopped watching. If she’d chosen Dani, they wouldn’t have been shacked up by now in some posh Malibu Beach digs with live Web cams recording their impossibly sexy 24/7 lives. And who wouldn’t want that? These days I’m on my couch waiting for the boy version of her show to win its spot on the air: one hot bi guy surrounded by 16 straight girls and 16 gay and bi boys competing for his attention. Nice. My TiVo is ready.”

Ultimate Fighting Championship: “But until I have that, I’ll settle for UFC. The other day I sat in bed surfing the channels and unwinding from a day filled equally with work and pathetic attempts and procrastination. Sidling past Bravo and the SciFi Channel, I see a flash of two men humping before my hyperactive remote trigger finger propelled the channels forward. Did my eyes deceive me? I pressed the remote to go back. Sure enough, there it was. Two muscular guys violently humping each other on the floor of a blood-splattered ring. After mentally double-checking that I hadn’t subscribed to any porn channels I settled back to watch. Sure, it’s macho. But UFC is also sexy in a boy-kink kinda way. Any man who grips his ankles around the waist of another man while fiercely wriggling against the ground outside the context of gay sex has to think at some point, ‘Hey, this guy is turning me into his bottom bitch.’”

Wanted: “Which brings me to the girl anyone would bottom for. My girlfriend said she wanted The Jolie as a birthday present. Obviously this isn’t something I can provide seeing that Brad Pitt already has a lock on it. Instead, I’ll be taking her to see the new movie, which apparently features Lips herself in all her tattooed and skinny glory. And although I’ll pretend to suffer through the experience, I — like about 99.9 percent of the world’s population — will enjoy every ridiculous and overblown moment of her slinking and shooting her way all over the movie screen.”

Lil Wayne: “Angelina’s lips. Lollipop. Lil Wayne. See how I got here? Like a lot of people, when I first heard Lil Wayne’s newest hit song, I couldn’t stand it. Now, when the song comes on in the club, you’d have to pry me off the dance floor with the promise of an open bar and free belly shots off any girl in the house. It’s catchy. Appropriately naughty. And even the kids love it.”

San Diego and Atlanta: “After being mostly gone from Atlanta for the past two years for graduate school, I’m rediscovering all the things I love about my adopted city. Comparing the two places, SD would seem the logical favorite with its beaches, pretty plants, ‘Baywatch’ bodies; but I feel like I’m just now waking up from some surreal dream experience to find that while the sleep was pleasant, the world around me is so much more pleasant. I happily say hello to cheaper everything, my beautiful black people and Callaway Gardens’ fake beach.”

MINI Cooper Convertible Love: “I’ve had a passionate love affair with this car now for going on three years.”

Charis Books & More: “This independent bookstore has been around forever. It’s one of the reasons I’ve stayed in Atlanta as long as I have. A place for children’s books of all sorts as well as a far-from-exhaustive but pretty damn good selection of lesbian fiction — mine included — Charis is just one of the gems of the Little Five Points neighborhood.”