Omnivore - Top Chef” All-stars: Southern comfort”

So. A Southern challenge. Don’t you kind of hate that the the South is portrayed to the rest of the world by the scariest human on the face of the universe? Thank god for John Besh later in the episode, but I wonder if anyone noticed his intelligence and class alongside that face, those teeth.

“I HAIS DEEP FRIED LASAGNAS! I HAIS DEEP FRIED BALLS-O-BUTTER!!” Make it stop. Please. Make it stop.

ISABELLA!!! OOOooooo. Isabellaaaa. Apart from the downright shadiness of stealing a dish from another chef, the chicken oyster is just so Blaisian, like nothing Isabella would ever cook. What is Isabella’s style anyway?

And here come the rejects, standing sadly with their piles of dead fish, hating every minute of it, looking murderously at the smug faces of those still in the game. It’s a particularly cruel part of the contract, the Bravo-owns-you-for-two-years clause, that brings these folks back to wallow in shame and passive aggressive “help.”

However, the Blais Fabio bromance is my favorite of all time. It’s grand, sprawling, epic, heart-wrenching. “You remind me of my ex wife.” Have you ever heard more beautiful words? Their spat as the judges approached was heartbreaking. I shed a tear.